Flow When You Show

“Bob was a builder. He was about 3’6” tall and weighed 68.37 pounds. He had brown hair but he always wore a yellow construction helmet. He had beady black eyes and a thin smile. He always wore a tool belt and blue overalls. He also always wore a plaid shirt.”

How’s that for a description? It has some pretty good details, right? Ok, I’ll admit it. That was a baited question. When asked to give more description in a paper, this is what most students will do. While the details are great, descriptions like this present a few problems:

• They usually overuse pronouns
• They break up action in a paper
• They sound like they are meeting a requirement
  

Let’s look at pronoun use in our example. Every sentence, besides the first one, starts with the pronoun “he.” Repeatedly using pronouns, or anything else for that matter, in a paragraph makes for a very choppy read. It makes it difficult for the reader to get into a rhythm. This monotony is one reason why the previously described style of writing is not the best.

Another thing that these descriptions do is that they break up action. For example, all the information in the sample description is good information. However, it comes all at once. Besides being choppy on its own, it hinders the flow of the paper. Assuming that the rest of a paper flows, a chunk of choppy, descriptive text can trash the paper.

A requirement list is like a list of ingredients, giving the essentials of what is needed to complete a paper (or recipe). Let’s say that the given paper requires a description. This is one ingredient. Imagine that someone took all the ingredients for a cake, individually baked them, and then mixed them all together. That would make for a disgusting cake. Just like a cake is more than just a random mixture of ingredients, a paper is more that just a compilation of required elements. A chunk of description in a paper is like a chunk of salt in a cake.

So what is a better way? Keeping with the cake analogy, mix up the ingredients before you bake them. Spread your descriptions throughout the paper, mixing them with action. Tell how Bob pushed his yellow helmet back as he wiped the sweat from his plastic brow. Tell how his plaid shirt ripped on a nail while he was reaching for a tool on his belt.

Description is to show, but when you show, make it flow.

whacked assignment… or opportunity to excel

“He just dreams up writing nightmares,” is a comment that I honestly hope students in my classes never utter.

When drafting and developing a writing assignment for students in my gen-ed and honors classes, I take a step back and ask myself 2 questions: (a) Would I want to do this if I were one of my students? And (b) Does the assignment relate practically to student realities and course content?

As an undergrad and a graduate student, my best writing involved assignments that were engaging (some topic I could wrap my head around) and related to my major/specialty areas (social sciences in general and sociology in particular). Sadly, some of those assignments were little more than busy work and seemingly poorly conceived. Those indeed required creative writing! I promised myself that if ever in the position of directing or facilitating student writing, the effort and product would be worth not only the student’s time and effort in its production, but also my time and effort to read it -- in short, making it a learning opportunity and experience for both of us: writer and reader!

Okay, so what if you have one of those dreaded whacked writing assignments?

1. Be certain you got it right. Often, assignments are based on readings, lecture notes, class discussions, or outside materials.
2. Ask for clarification from the prof. They are getting paid to impart knowledge, not befuddle. Make them earn their money!
3. If the expectation is still murky, “make it your own.” Draft what you think is asked for. Ask the prof (or teaching assistant, who is the likely grader anyway) to see if you are on track. At the very least, it will show that you not only care about the assignment but are also proactive about your grade. Don’t be afraid to shatter the prof’s notion that you are just another one of those students who attempts to manage only minimal work in the hope of a maximum grade.

These 3 common sense steps (in order of increasing recourse) ought to help take you out of the nebulous cloud of an ambiguous writing assignment and provide the opportunity to polish your writing skill, pull an optimal grade, and impress a prof with your motivation to excel.

Give Yourself a Little Credit

Here I sit, in front of the ol' computer screen, mere moments after finishing a group tutoring session with two capable and intelligent students, each of whom wrote a rough-but-promising first draft of an essay describing a memorable event in their lives. As I reflect on the session, however, the content of their papers becomes fuzzy; all I can remember is unending self-deprecation.

"Yikes! That was a terrible sentence," one client blurted out in the middle of reading her paper.

"Whoa...this is so badly written. I'm sorry," the other said when reading her draft.

And those aren't the only examples I could give. There were many other times at which both students interrupted their reading, apparently to let me and the other group member know how aware they were that their first drafts were not sterling and polished. It's almost as if simply reading the draft without the commentary would label them not only bad writers, but frighteningly unaware bad writers. The running commentary seemingly passed from one student to the other, as they each seemed too self-conscious to focus on reading their papers. The most common phrase uttered for the hourlong session was, "I'm sorry."

Somewhere between the fifth and tenth apology I got to thinking...self-deprecation is not uncommon among writers at any level. Personally, I couldn't tell you which sin I have committed more: thinking my writing was complete garbage and being wrong, or feeling like I wrote the perfect piece of genius literature and being...not quite right.

Self-doubt--and, occasionally, self-loathing--fits the artistic mold like a glove, and whether you love to write or hate to write, whether you are enrolled in writing-intensive English or are merely writing one 3-4 page essay for a history class, being a college student means adapting to the artistic mold, too. As a result, even students who don't fancy themselves "writers" fall prey to the same self-doubt that plagues those willing to label themselves with such a dubious distinction.

Taking all these thoughts into consideration, I arrived at a very simple conclusion, one cleverly disguised as a question: Why apologize?

If ever there was a unified message of this blog, it is that writing is a process. The road from first draft to final draft may vary in length, but there more than likely will be a road. You cannot expect to bloom precious literary foliage after only one try. The idea is to plant the seeds...or lay the groundwork...or whatever other mixed metaphor you can think of. In time, your ideas will fully bloom.

So give yourself a little credit...and a little time. Your masterpiece is merely in progress.

Now, if only I could have said that to my clients....

A little of this, A little of that

I know what you're thinking, "Who's this girl, and why is she blogging now?" Well, the truth is, I have spent most of this quarter trying to think of something to blog about. I came up with a few ideas, but none seemed blog-worthy. I suppose I'm somewhat of a perfectionist.


Let me start with an introduction. I am a tutor at the University Writing Center, and a freshman at Wright State. You may be wondering how a lowly freshman can get a job at a wonderful place like the Writing Center, right? It was simple, really. As a senior in high school, I participated in a program called PSEO (Post-Secondary Education Option), which enabled me to take college classes for free, recieving high school and college credit at the same time. In this program, I took the first two English classes in the General Education Requirement along with a few others that I got to bypass here at Wright State. It was a very good experience, and I recommend it to anyone who is still in high school.



I guess now I'm supposed to talk about writing, right? One thing I found that has made me a better writer is reading. I'm a very active bookworm; I read about a book or two per week. I've found that in reading, I have greatly improved my vocabulary, as well as grammar. I have even found myself noticing grammatical mistakes in published books. Reading a lot really familiarizes you with the english language; you start to learn how to figure out the meaning of words based on their context.



For instance, you read a sentence that has a confusing word in it, so you want to find out what that word means in order to understand the sentence better. Nine times out of ten, you can look at the rest of the paragraph or even just the rest of the sentence to find the meaning of that one word. Once you have an idea of what the word means, you can replace it with a synonym and store it for future reference. If you do this often enough, with enough words, eventually it will build up your vocabulary, which will greatly improve your writing.
So there it is. A little about me, a little about writing. More to come soon.

Random Blurts

We've all heard it happen, I'm sure. Everyone is sitting, talking, having an enjoyable time, then, suddenly and without warning, someone randomly blurts out something that seems to be completely disconnected from the previous topic of discussion. Chances are, you’ve been in one of those situations, or perhaps you caused it. You’ve given, or received one of those puzzled looks, and you’ve felt the awkward silence.

This unfortunate situation not only happens in speaking but in writing as well. The main problem is that, while you can explain yourself for random utterances in person, you can’t always be there to explain the random things in your paper.

Transitions are a crucial part of speech and writing. Without them, it is nearly impossible to maintain a decent flow of ideas. The point of a transition is to effectively connect two ideas. Just like when you are speaking, when writing, don’t just give an idea. Connect one idea to the previous one. Your paragraphs in an essay are your ideas. To be effective, start with a topic sentence to show the relationship of the paragraph to the one preceding it. At the end of each paragraph, give a sense of completion, and end on a note that leaves the door open for a smooth transition to the next paragraph.

Smooth transitions ensure that the flow of ideas will be understood more easily by readers. Using transitions effectively in writing, and with speech, help put a stop to those awkward moments caused by Random Blurts.

________________________________________________
Now check the transitions in what you’ve just read:
Title: Random Blurts.
Opening sentence, paragraph 1: connects title to the reader.
Closing sentence, paragraph 1: describes the situation.
Opening sentence, paragraph 2: connects the situation to writing.
Closing sentence, paragraph 2: shows the way poor transitions affect writing.
Opening sentence, paragraph 3: presents the importance of good transitions.
Closing sentence, paragraph 3: gives ideas of how to make a smooth paragraph closing.
Opening sentence, paragraph 4: brings up the benefits of smooth transitions.
Closing sentence, paragraph 4: relates transitions in speaking and writing back to the title.

Who Cares About Writing Anway?

Words are like children. Great care must be given to them when they come into existence.

In the years that led me to become the writer that I am today, I started as someone who didn't really like writing. It took far too much time. It was tedious and tasteless. I didn't care for it, but it was a necessary evil. Reports were tolerable, but essays left a bitter taste in my mouth--as if I'd been drinking unsweetened lemonade.

I didn't honestly enjoy writing until I took English 101 during my freshman year at Wright State. I can still remember writing a vivid narrative of the time my brother and I made a silent film. It all led up to the moment that I stood on a rooftop and jumped off, landing on a dilapidated trampoline that did nearly nothing to break my fall, but it was for the camera--and it looked great. I had fun writing it, and the "A" I got on it was nice too.

During freshman year I also began writing poetry, which I understand may sound strange since I was a Computer Science major at the time. I found that poetry allowed me to express myself in ways that C++ code could not. Poetry was personal. Besides that, ordinary people had greater appreciation for reading a page of poetry rather than code. Before I'd gotten through the middle of my sophomore year, I decided that English was for me, and I changed my major to Technical Writing.

Writing is, and perhaps always will be, a tedious task for me. It is a challenge, but I have never been one to back away from a challenge. Words, like children, must be tended to. You can't just let them run wild. Looking after your words is something you will do for the rest of your life. I once thought that writing was an isolated task, something that had no use outside of a writing class. Over the years I've seen otherwise. Words and writing are a major part of our lives. Choosing your words carefully when you write trains you to do the same thing when you speak, and unless you are awesome at saying the right thing the first time and every time, writing is something that will be useful for the rest of your life, in school and out of school.

If you don't believe me, stay tuned for more. I'll prove it!

(Did you see that? I just created a thesis. I plan to prove that writing affects every aspect of our lives. The funny thing is, I wasn't trying to form a thesis. You'll see, we use the conventions of writing every day without realizing it.)

Don't Expect a Creative Title

Since most of the other blog contributors have introduced themselves, I figure I ought to do so as well. But the problem is, I’m not sure where to start. Unlike many of my fellow tutors, I am not creative. I can’t remember the last time I’ve written a story or a poem or really anything even somewhat entertaining. And there are plenty of writing assignments that I flat-out loathe.

But, I’m an English major.

Sometimes I’m not sure how it happened. I changed my major a million times, and I finally realized I better decide on something. But now it’s funny—everyone has an opinion ready when I tell them I’m an English major. Some people laugh. “Wow, must be hard to study the language you speak.” Others are actually somewhat impressed. Someone once told me he thought studying English for four years would be the equivalent of spending four years in prison. I took it as a compliment, and I was rather smug the remainder of the day.. or year.

But in the back of my mind, I know how it happened. Without writing, I think my brain would explode. The problem is, I think too much. All the time. I analyze, I worry, I plan, I obsess, I daydream. And most of it is useless. However, sometimes I stumble upon a gem. A great idea that I just need to get down on paper before I forget. Other times, I have to write down what I’m thinking just to get it out of my head and be done with it. But most of all, I write to understand and organize my thoughts—I couldn’t live without lists.

So how does this relate to anyone other than me? Maybe it doesn't. But basically, I’ve realized that writing is so much more than fulfilling an assignment. Of course writing can be painful, but it can also be liberating. A few years back, I found a quote that pretty much sums up how I feel about writing. So when I’m sitting in front of computer screen grudgingly typing an unwelcome essay, I remember why I write:

"I write entirely to find out what I'm thinking, what I'm looking at, what I see and what it means."
—Joan Didion